Category Archives: Parenting

by

Back to School – That is the Question!

School is starting this week here in our community.  Some of you have over a month before your child or children begin school for the 2012-2013 school term, some of you may have years before your child reaches that magic age – 5 years old!

 Home school, public school, private school, Christian school, or charter school? Which option is best for your child and when? There are valid, compelling cases to be made for each of the above options. Many of you have talked to family, friends, and acquaintances that have STRONG opinions about which option is best. Some of these well-meaning folks will share their opinions with you even when you don’t ask. Some hold strong opinions because they feel that the path they chose had the positive outcomes they desired for their child. Others are equally convinced that their child suffered because of the educational choices the parents made, so they discourage making the same “mistake”. As with many things in parenting, there is no ONE RIGHT answer.

As parents of young children, my husband and I did all of the following at one time or another – homeschooling, Christian school, and public school.  It was not because we couldn’t make up our minds – it was because at different times, for different children, we felt led by God to choose various options.

If our goal as parents is to raise children that will seek and follow God’s will for their lives, then selecting their means of education is very important. Yet, the method must never be selected to ensure the child’s spiritual future. There is no Bible verse that says, “For it is by home schooling you are saved, that not of yourself, it is the instruction of parents or Godly teachers, least anyone should boast.” No, the Bible verse that illuminates Truth in this area is

Ephesians 2:8-10 (NIV)

8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith —and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one can boast. 10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

Even the best instruction by the best teachers in the best home, Christian school, public, private or charter school will not ensure our children’s salvation.

Some of you are searching for assurance that the educational decision you have made for your child is the “right” one, the one that will guarantee a positive outcome. It may be the right decision – yet the outcome is up to God.  There is no one blanket solution that applies to everyone.  In making your decision, it may be helpful to prayerfully consider the following:

  • What options are available to us? This may make the choice simple.
  • Is my child naturally a leader or a follower?  If my child follows their peers, social pressure may be an issue.
  • Are they socially mature? Does my child need to be around other children to learn to share, take turns, realize they are NOT the center of the universe?
  • Are there services (special education classes, speech therapy, etc.) that the public school offers that will benefit my child? Often, children with special needs have more services available in public school. Some services are available to those who home school as well.
  • Are the teachers my children have equipped, nurturing, and do they love what they do? This MUST be the case whether the teacher is a parent, or in any of the various school settings. Sadly, not all Christian teachers have the above qualities. I know many public school teachers who see their profession as a calling from God and it is evident in their classrooms.

As a parent, you still have the most important influence on your child’s education. What you say and do at home is far more influential then what happens in the classroom, even if the classroom is the dining room. Your role as a parent carries over from year to year throughout your child’s life and informs everything else that happens to your child.

I can remember being so concerned as each of our children started school – even when I was their teacher! The Biblical account in Daniel of the four boys taken into captivity in Babylon gave me great comfort and hope, especially as our teenagers started public high school. These boys were about 12 years old, taken from their homes and families to a foreign land and educated by a secular, pagan culture. Yet the teaching they had at home was imbedded in their hearts and even when they were tempted with the king’s rich food and drink and the choice between compromise and death – they did not give in.

Daniel 3:16-17

16 Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to him, “King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. 17 If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and He will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. 18 But even if He does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up. ”

God is faithful….

…WHATEVER TYPE OF SCHOOL SETTING!

by

Sense of Humor

“I have a dream that SOMEDAY, I will be able to stand at the stove and fix dinner without little hands pulling my pants down around my knees …..”

“I have a dream that SOMEDAY, I will be able to go to the bathroom, BY MYSELF, without someone banging on the door crying “Mommy, Mommy!”…..”

“I have a dream that SOMEDAY, it will be quiet when I call someone on the phone and crying will not erupt as soon as the phone is answered….”

“I have a dream that SOMEDAY, cleaning up after a meal will not include scraping food off the floor, chairs, and nearby walls….”

I remember clearly the afternoon 25 years ago that a dozen of us moms were waiting to collect our children after T-Ball. We were talking about fixing supper – what we had planned to cook, etc. We were sharing the fact that some of us had something in the crock pot, some had meat thawing on the counter, and some did not have a clue yet what they would serve for supper within the next hour or so.

It was at this point that Sue Bartlett spontaneously broke into her “I have a dream….” speech.  It was in no way disrespectful of Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King’s amazing speech. Sue took the general outline and cadence of the famous sermon and started saying the words above in a loud, commanding voice.

We started laughing and couldn’t stop!  Some of us laughed so hard we doubled over. It was one of those rare moments when humor fits the situation perfectly and all of us connected with Sue. We were living those same situations and yet we often didn’t see them as funny.

Following that afternoon, when one of those “dream” situations occurred – as they often did – I had a totally new perspective. I found myself smiling, remembering Sue’s rendition as my toddler banged on the bathroom door crying. Sometimes I would start to preach my own dream speech to my children as they hung on my legs crying.  I’m sure they thought I had lost it (as they often did) but it lightened the mood and certainly changed my attitude from frustration to irony.

Proverbs 17:22 (NLT)

22 A cheerful heart is good medicine,
but a broken spirit saps a person’s strength.

Just as this verse from the Book of Wisdom says, seeing the humor in a situation will help us face it in a more positive light. Being the mother of small children is challenging and takes emotional, physical, and intellectual strength. When we find ourselves drained of strength – look for humor – it lightens the load! Next time you see or hear something funny with your child, write it down – you will be encouraged. Then, share it with us so we can laugh with you!

by

A New Creation

During this past two months we have been blessed with two new creations! One little boy, Caleb Benjamin,  and in just this past two weeks, a little girl, Adella Kathleen. I have flown to Washington State to be with this precious little girl and her three brothers.  One of the joys of Nanahood!

I’ve noticed that one of the first things we do when a new baby is born is compare that child to a family member. “Who does she look like?” “He has his daddy’s smile!” The comparisons seem never-ending , and in fact they are.

I am 60 years old. People STILL tell me how much I look like my mother! It started as soon as I was born – so I am told  – (unlike our son, I don’t remember my actual birth – he claims he does) and continues, to this day. Once in my life someone told me I looked like my father. I politely asked this individual if they had ever met my mother – they had not.

As soon as our first daughter was born, Phil called my mother and announced “Now there are three of you.” Bless their hearts, two of our daughters live with the stigma of favoring their mother in appearance. A friend of mine asked my mother one day if any of our daughters reminded her of me. Without hesitation she replied “Oh, no. They are much prettier than Gayle ever was.” (Some of you are feeling horror at this moment – don’t  – Mother was right)

The fact remains that it is in our nature to compare children and their appearance to relatives we feel they favor, sometimes even ancient ancestors. “Great-great Uncle Reuben had ears just like those!”  These innocent little babies are tagged from the start. Yet to be fair there are certainly family characteristics that are in our DNA . My parents moved near us following  7 years of living in Taiwan. After hearing my mother speak,  people in stores and businesses would ask her if she knew Gayle Woody – our voices sound that similar.

I love the verses in  2 Corinthians 5:17-20  – New Living Translation (NLT)

17 This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!

18 And all of this is a gift from God, who brought us back to Himself through Christ. And God has given us this task of reconciling people to Him. 19 For God was in Christ, reconciling the world to Himself, no longer counting people’s sins against them. And He gave us this wonderful message of reconciliation. 20 So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making His appeal through us. We speak for Christ when we plead, “Come back to God!”

Just as each baby born is a new creation with a unique DNA, when we become Christians, we become new creations as well. “The old life is gone; a new life has begun!”

We look at these new-born children and think of the great potential each has. Our heavenly Father looks at us and does the same thing! What a blessing to know God as Father. As loving parents, we make every effort possible to help our children to reach their full potential. God does that with us well. God has given us the Holy Spirit to equip us to be His hands and feet wherever we are. Just as our family has hopes and dreams for Caleb and Adella, God has those hopes and dreams for us who are His children. We are so blessed to be part of God’s family.