Given Away

I was talking with my friend Lois, who is also a lover of plants, and we were discussing what is currently blooming in our yards. I mentioned to her that our calla lilies, some of which Lois gave me, are blooming profusely. Lois did the flowers for all three of our daughters’ weddings. Salem, first to get married, wanted calla lilies for her flowers. Much later, after Lois had made the bouquets and flower arrangements, she gave me some of the calla lily plants she had used in making the bouquets. Now, many years later, we have blooms that remind us of Salem’s wedding flowers – but also of the generous friendship of Lois over the years.

I thanked Lois again for those plants and she said “I have heard it said that we are not remembered for what we have, but what we give away.”

How profound!

This made me think about all the plants in my yard that have been given to me by friends.

The first plant “gift” I received was from a friend’s mother, Mrs. Gamble. We stayed in her lovely home in Atlanta and as we walked around her garden, I admired the plant that bordered her flower beds. “That’s liriope or monkey grass as we call it. Do you want some?” She dug some up, put it in plastic bags and I still have that border grass today, multiplied many times over and some 43 years and a house later.

I have daisies from Alice Marie Pendergast, pink lilies from Carol Buchanan, Japanese maples from Mitzi Barker (Oregon) day lilies from Mary Henson, hydrangeas, a magnolia tree, and camellia bush from Salem, Japanese maples from Hannah (Washington), a variegated yucca and a rose bush from Abigail, forsythia, variegated periwinkle, and sedum from Aunt Matrid and Aunt Priscilla, a peony from Thomasina, dahlias from David Nestler, bee balm from Ann-Marie Jones, ferns from Julie Phillips, lentin rose and calla lilies from Lois Cline, trillium and purple bells from Toni Mullaney, a gardenia bush from Linda Harrill-Rudesall, a clematis from Deanna Wright, amarylis from Janice Stiens, and the most amazing rhododendrons that Peggy Mason planted and we inherited when we moved here.

I remember all these dear family and friends each time I see our flowers blooming and tend to our garden. What a legacy of love and friendship! Each one gave something away.

In Acts 20:34-35 Paul shares this same principle –

34 You know that these hands of mine have worked to supply my own needs and even the needs of those who were with me. 35 And I have been a constant example of how you can help those in need by working hard. You should remember the words of the Lord Jesus: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’”

I have been so blessed by all those who have shared their plants with me. AND – I am so blessed to share plants with others. I enjoy seeing those plants in a new location, thriving and bringing beauty to that place. It does seem that the more plants I give away, the more plants I have to give away! Those places where I dig up plants leaves room for more plants to grow.

God’s love is like that. As I share His love with others I sense more of His love for me – which then allows me to share more of His love with others. God’s love should be given away.

“For God so loved the world….”

Cut it Out

Our family has a statement about our father that tells much about his character.

“He would rather cut off his arm than cut down a tree.”

Dad loved trees and spent hours taking folks on hikes in the Great Smoky Mountains identifying trees and describing their qualities and interactions with the environment. He planted various varieties of trees and loved the unique aspects of each. Big old trees were held in special esteem by Dad and he valued the size and leaf canopy of old growth trees. In his 80’s our father took up a new hobby for him – turning wooden bowls. He found special joy in using a variety of wood – admiring the grain, color, and texture of each different type of wood. He NEVER cut a live tree to get wood to turn into one of his bowls. He collected dead trees and cut them up carefully treating the ends of each cut so the wood dried slowly and didn’t split.

There was one exception to Dad’s self imposed “no cutting trees” rule. He would thin out small trees to encourage maximum growth of a more desirable tree. One example was his suggestion that we cut a tulip poplar that was growing near a gingko tree. His reasoning was that we had LOTS of tulip poplar trees, some being very large. This little tulip poplar would eventually become large and overshadow our one lone gingko tree. Phil cut the poplar down and several years later our gingko tree has grown to a large tree with a beautiful shape. Cutting down one tree definitely enhanced the life of the other tree.

There are times in our lives when we need to “cut something out”. It can be an activity, a habit that is unproductive, media use, a commitment that is no longer required, or an activity that someone else could do. Often those activities are good. Yet they may be occupying space (time) in our day that crowds out other better things. Just as I made a judgement on which is the more desirable tree, I make judgements on how I spend my 24 hours a day.

Have you found yourself saying “I am overwhelmed by what I have to do”?

Something needs to be cut out.

That is easier said than done. There have been times in my life when I was overwhelmed by the needs of my children, aging parents, job responsibilities, etc. – NONE of which I could (or wanted) to cut out.

Yet more often I am my own worst enemy. I pile things on because I think I “should”, I can’t say “no”, or I don’t realize I am doing too much until I am overwhelmed!

In Matthew 13:22-23 Jesus explains the parable of planting seeds he has just used in teaching his followers.

22 The seed that fell among the thorns represents those who hear God’s word, but all too quickly the message is crowded out by the worries of this life and the lure of wealth, so no fruit is produced. 23 The seed that fell on good soil represents those who truly hear and understand God’s word and produce a harvest of thirty, sixty, or even a hundred times as much as had been planted!”

No fruit is produced from seeds that are “crowded out by the worries of this life”. Notice Jesus does not say “if there are worries” or “you might feel worried”. No, when Jesus says the worries of this life it says to me that life has worries. Yet Jesus wants his followers to know that he has given them NEW LIFE which produces the fruit of the Holy Spirit in their lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. (Gal.5:22)

So if I cut out the things in my life that crowd out the fruit of the Holy Spirit, I am able to experience peace and joy in the midst of my circumstances.

Happy Mother’s Day

I was talking to our daughter Hannah today – wishing her a Happy Mother’s Day – expressing to her how thankful I am for the mothers she and her sisters are. I sent them these flowers, well this picture of the flowers. 🙂

Hannah thanked me for being her mother, which has been a blessing since the day her smile graced this world. I told her I had a wonderful mother who also had a wonderful mother!

Truth be told, I am not sure about the mothers beyond that. My mother’s mother left Sweden in 1920 – by herself – at 16 to immigrate to the United States. Great Grandma Anderson did something I can’t imagine allowing my daughter do at 16 years old – leave on a ship traversing the ocean not knowing if I would ever see her again!

The mothers in my families’ past (as far as family stories go) share one foundational characteristic – faith in God. I have a picture of my Grandmother Barker as a small child on her Grandmother Brant’s lap. It was taken in 1898 and there are white tents in the background. The family is at a church Camp Meeting in rural Illinois. I have Grandma Barker’s Bible and it is well marked and her notes line the margins.

So, I am the blessed recipient of generations of mothers who have lived with faith in God. They certainly weren’t perfect, nor did they have lives void of pain and suffering. Yet by the grace of God they passed on that faith to following generations including me.

The sermon today included the following passage of scripture about Mary, Jesus’ mother. After the angel comes to Mary to announce that she will give birth to the Son of God by the power of the Holy Spirit, Mary goes to visit her cousin Elizabeth. Luke 1:39-45 says

39 A few days later Mary hurried to the hill country of Judea, to the town 40 where Zechariah lived. She entered the house and greeted Elizabeth. 41 At the sound of Mary’s greeting, Elizabeth’s child leaped within her, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit.

42 Elizabeth gave a glad cry and exclaimed to Mary, “God has blessed you above all women, and your child is blessed. 43 Why am I so honored, that the mother of my Lord should visit me? 44 When I heard your greeting, the baby in my womb jumped for joy. 45 You are blessed because you believed that the Lord would do what he said.”

The last verse – 45 – jumped out at me. Why was Mary blessed? “You are blessed because you believed that the Lord would do what he said.”

Mary wasn’t blessed because she was perfect, more intelligent, better looking, or stronger than others. She was blessed because she had faith that God would do what he said. God told her she would give birth to the Son of God, the promised messiah who would fulfill the covenant made to Abraham. God was faithful to his promise.

I will be blessed and my children and grandchildren will be blessed from generation to generation when I have faith and believe that God will do what he said. That is the greatest legacy I can leave as a mother.