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Stacking Up Rocks

 

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My goal for this year is to stack rocks.

Do you ever have a song that gets stuck in your head? You find yourself “singing” the words over and over? Well, not necessarily singing them out loud, but the words repeatedly run through your mind like a creek flowing over rocks.

The new song “Stacking Up the Rocks” by Balsam Range, the award-winning bluegrass group with roots here in Jackson County, is that kind of song. If you haven’t heard it – you need to.

But be prepared – it will stick with you like honey on warm cornbread!

The chorus that keeps flowing through my head goes like this:

Stacking up the rocks at the edge of the water

A memorial of the miracles He did for thee

That all the people of the Lord might remember

That the hand of the Lord is mighty.

Buddy Melton was moved to write this song when his mother, Ann Melton, reminded him of a scripture in Joshua 4:1-8

Joshua 4:1-8 (NIV)

4 When the whole nation had finished crossing the Jordan, the Lord said to Joshua, 2 “Choose twelve men from among the people, one from each tribe, 3 and tell them to take up twelve stones from the middle of the Jordan, from right where the priests are standing, and carry them over with you and put them down at the place where you stay tonight.”

4 So Joshua called together the twelve men he had appointed from the Israelites, one from each tribe, 5 and said to them, “Go over before the ark of the Lord your God into the middle of the Jordan. Each of you is to take up a stone on his shoulder, according to the number of the tribes of the Israelites, 6 to serve as a sign among you. In the future, when your children ask you, ‘What do these stones mean?’ 7 tell them that the flow of the Jordan was cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord. When it crossed the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. These stones are to be a memorial to the people of Israel forever.”

Buddy had experienced a miracle in his life when God healed him after a serious brain injury caused by a farming accident. This song is Buddy’s “memorial rock”.

Notice what verse 6 says “when your children ask you “What do these stones mean?” tell them…..”

I want to stack stones this year, maybe literally, but certainly figuratively.

I want to do this by –

  • recognizing each miracle – big and small – that God performs in my life
  • memorialize it in some way by writing it down, taking a photo, or making a piece of art
  • share it with my children and grandchildren

What a blessing it will be to remember “that the hand of the Lord is mighty!”

Let’s start stacking up rocks in 2016 …

 

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Unsolicited Advice

Three Generations - Four Mothers

Three Generations – Four Mothers

“Don’t give advice to your adult children unless they ask for your advice.”

I made this statement to a friend whose daughter recently got married. Now she has a son-in-law for the first time. This couple recently moved to another state and my friend wondered about sharing some practical advice with them that she thought would be helpful.

We have three sons-in-law, and I realized early on that as soon as our daughters got married, their source of advice switched. As well it should.

The Bible says in Genesis 2:24

24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

So, the man and wife each LEAVE their father and mother and become one. Notice it doesn’t say “and become six” which would include both sets of parents.

Leaving is not just a physical act, it is also intellectual and emotional.

  • leaving physically  – changing location of “home”
  • leaving intellectually – understanding what it means to become one, choosing your spouse over others
  • leaving emotionally – feelings that your love and loyalty goes to your spouse first

That is why we shouldn’t give unsolicited advice. When we do, our adult child is put in the middle and must decide between following the parent’s advice – or the advice of their spouse.

That is not fair.

Do I always follow this practice myself?

Absolutely not!

Do I never give unsolicited advice?

Unfortunately, I do.

But I have three daughters who will respectfully let me know – “Mom, this is not your business.” It is a very good thing that they do. I don’t want our daughters or our sons-in-law to dread my interference in their lives.

I had 20+ years to tell our children what to do – to mess with their lives. That was enough time.

We often look back fondly on the “good old days” of our children being young and think that our grandchildren should have the same opportunities. We remember how we used to do things and think it was so much better.

But was it really better? Was it better because we were young and we remember how it felt being young?

Our children and grandchildren will look BACK on these current times and someday remember them as “the good old days”. Imagine that!

What can we do when we see something that sincerely concerns us about our adult children or grandchildren?

Pray.

Philippians 4:6-8  (TLB)

6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything; tell God your needs, and don’t forget to thank him for his answers. 7 If you do this, you will experience God’s peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will keep your thoughts and your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Christ Jesus.

When our adult children do ask for advice – give it respectfully and thoughtfully. What a blessing it is to have adult children seek our advice!

When my parents lived with us, Phil would often ask my father for advice, especially when it came to plants and trees, my father’s field of study. My dad is the kind of person who never gives advice unless asked, which is a reason we were able to live together so well. In the past several months, two of our sons-in-law have asked Phil for advice. Phil also does not give advice unless he is asked. We were blessed that they valued Phil’s thoughts.

So, remember to treat our adult children as we want to be treated. That is why the golden rule is golden…..

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The Best Ever Christmas Tree

Tree with Lincoln

We couldn’t afford it, but I wanted a REAL Christmas tree. This was in 1980 and trees didn’t cost all that much. Yet we had only $15.00 in our checking account and a Christmas tree would not have provided food for our then three children.

  • Our bank balance was low for several reasons.
    We had just closed on the purchase of our first home.
  • It was November and the furnace needed a “tune up” immediately so that took our $200 reserve fund.
  • We didn’t have much money to start with. I was staying home with our three children aged 3, 2, and 9 months old, so we were living on a library cataloger’s salary.

God had shown himself so faithful in the purchase of our house. He had provided all we needed and there was one more paycheck coming before the property taxes were due. God had promised to supply all our needs according to his riches in glory and we had witnessed that, one bill at a time.
Christmas trees are not a need.

I knew this, yet I wanted a Christmas tree for our first Christmas in our first home of our own.
So, I told God how I felt. I wanted a Christmas tree, but if it was not to be, I asked God to change my heart about a desire for a tree.
That week, the last in November, we were driving back from a holiday dinner at a friend’s house who lived in Cashiers, a remote community farther up in the mountains. Phil came around a curve and we saw something dark and large lying in the road. He pulled our little VW bug over and stopped.

There in the middle of the road was a big, BEAUTIFUL, Christmas tree!
It must have fallen off a truck hauling Christmas trees from the tree farms up the mountain. It was dark, there were no trucks around, nor any other cars. The tree was there just for us!
It was our Christmas tree – and much lovelier than one we would have purchased. Phil opened the trunk, which is in the front in a VW bug, put the tree part way in, and tied the trunk down as far as he could. He slowly drove the 18 miles home.

Did God provide that tree? Does God care about Christmas trees?

Some Christians I know and love feel that all the trappings of Christmas take away from it’s real meaning. These individuals choose to celebrate Jesus’ birth in simple ways. I respect that and honor their motivation.
I also know that receiving that Christmas tree during a time of financial need made me feel God’s love for me in a very personal way. I felt that my Heavenly Father heard me and answered the cry of my heart.
Why?
Because He loves me.

Was it a coincidence that the tree fell off the truck at that time? No other car could have passed by it without effort because the tree was smack in the middle of the narrow, winding road. It meant that the tree fell off and we were the first car to go by.

Maybe it was chance.
Yet it answered my prayer to the God of the universe who is my Heavenly Father.
Gifts often demonstrate love. Christmas is the time we celebrate God’s gift of his Son, Jesus.

John 3:16-17(NIV)
16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.

Every year when I put up our tree, I remember the best tree we ever had. More importantly I am reminded of my Heavenly Father who knows my heart and loves me. God gave us His BEST GIFT when He sent Jesus.

May you have a Merry Christmas celebrating God’s love – which He demonstrated by sending Jesus to earth.
PS – a great story to read to your children is – The Year of the Perfect Christmas Tree by Gloria Huston. It is a lovely story with a meaningful message.