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Inside Out

Adahlyn in barn

You can often tell early, even from their toddler days, if a child is going to care about what they wear, or if clothes are just an afterthought.

Our son often put his clothes on backwards and only cared about what he put on if it had a logo or name of a sports team he favored. He is still pretty much that way, although I haven’t noticed that his clothes are ever on backwards. What he wears is still not a priority.

Our middle daughter cared about the color and style of her clothing as soon as she was able to see -in other words – right from birth. She would remove any clothing that did not meet her approval, which often delayed our departure for the library, church, pretty much anywhere we went. She would cry if her tights were wrinkled and if her socks didn’t match her outfit. Now she has her own style and always looks “well put together”. I haven’t heard her cry about clothes in years.

Clothes don’t make a person, but they certainly convey information about personality and prefrences. My mother let me pick out my clothes and I developed a taste for bright colors and “interesting” fabrics at an early age. (Need I say that our third daughter does NOT want me to pick out her clothes?)

In college – as an art major – my dress was considered…well..different. But artists have always dressed “differently”, ok, oddly. To compound matters, it was the early 1970’s and young people who WEREN’T art majors dressed expressively. I made long dresses out of bedspreads from India, patched my jeans with scraps of calico prints, wore tie dye when you had to make it yourself, and wore blue suede boots. I did not look as cool as I thought I did.

The Bible tells us that what we wear on the outside is not as important as what is on the inside.

1 Peter 3:3-5 (NLT)

3 Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. 4 You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God. 5 This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They trusted God and accepted the authority of their husbands.

I think it is good to allow our children to wear what they want at times, yet let them know that there are other times they must wear certain things. Just as baseball players wear uniforms that identify them with their team, certain situations call for certain attire.

We also want our children to know that MUCH MORE IMPORTANT than the clothes they wear is the condition of their hearts – what’s inside. When conversations about clothes come up – use it as an opportunity to talk to them about the fact that what is in their hearts will show on their faces and in their words. If there is selfishness and impatience in our hearts – it will come out in our facial expressions and what we say.

Our challenge is to let God change us from the inside out.

Then it really doesn’t matter what we wear.

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No Vacations for Brains

Reading the "Hobbit" at six months.

Reading the Hobbit at six months.

We have competitive children. I thought this “one-ups-man-ship” would end when they finished school and college sports, etc.

Oh, no. As soon as our first grandchild was born, our son started questioning what books her mother was reading to his niece and how often.

“I read War and Peace in kindergarten.” he said to his sister.

Soon after, this young mother e-mailed the above picture showing her six-month-old reading the Hobbit.

This has all been in fun, yet reading to our children and grandchildren is the single MOST important activity we can engage in to encourage healthy brain development. Recent research with brain imaging shows that brain activity of infants greatly increases when they hear live language spoken to them. This same brain activity does not appear when these same infants hear voices from electronic devices like televisions or computers, including recordings of the parents’ own voices.

What better way to share our live voices than to read to our little ones!

As our children grew older and started to read themselves, they still wanted us to read aloud. We went through The Little House sseries, The Tower of Gehbora trilogy, The Lord of the Rings after the Hobbit, and The Narnia Chronicles to name a few. Those times of family reading are special memories.

In Deuteronomy, God is giving the law to his people. He is encouraging them to share his words with their children.
Deuteronomy 6:4-7(NIV)

4 Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. 6 These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

Don’t let our children’s brains go on vacation this summer!

Plan to read to them each day if possible. There are many great series to choose from – and include Bible stories as well. Most public libraries have summer reading programs that encourage children to read and be read to.

After you read together – talk about what you read. Verse 7 gives some practical advice about when to do this:
* when you sit at home – meals
* when you walk along the road – or drive
* when you lie down – for nap or bedtime
* when you get up – morning devotions

So as summer is fast approaching – lets make sure that there are no vacations for brains!

The Media Specialist (Librarian) at my school recently shared this link to an article that shares some insightful information on the importance of reading. Please check this out – you will be inspired!http://nyti.ms/1gwXt6m

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All Alone

twins 1
A loud cry of distress came from the bedroom where our daughter had just put her twin sons, aged three, to bed. They were staying with us for the weekend and the boys were pretty worn out from playing outside.

She opened the door, quietly entered the bedroom and realized that, in spite of some significantly loud crying, one twin was already asleep.

“What is wrong?” she asked between his sobs.

“I’m all alone!” he wailed.

“No, you are not. Amos is right here in bed with you,” his mom replied.

“He’s all alone, too!” came the answer.

Needless to say, we laughed about this situation and the irony of the little guy feeling alone with his brother next to him in the same bed.

Yet aren’t we guilty of the same response at times? We may be facing a difficult time in our marriage, with our children, or in the congregation where we fellowship. People are all around us, even in the same room, yet we feel all alone.

Mothers of new babies often feel this sense of isolation. This can be especially true if the new mom is staying home with the baby after having a job where there was social interaction on a daily basis.

I remember moving to Kentucky so that Phil could start seminary when our first child was just 3 months old. I was alone in a new community where I didn’t know anyone – with a baby who didn’t communicate verbally. Three months earlier I had been teaching kindergarten with 23 students who loved me and often told me so.

Now I was all alone

…with a baby.

I remember thinking about the best time to go to the laundrymat. When would I have the greatest chance to meet other moms of young children?

I was so lonely.

I wasn’t alone, though. My Heavenly Father was with me. I was so focused on my feelings of isolation that I did not recognize His presence. Just as Tyler did not feel the comfort of his brother’s presence, I did not sense that God was right with me in that new location.

Psalm 16:10-11 (NIV)

10 because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead,
nor will you let your faithful one see decay.
11 You make known to me the path of life;
you will fill me with joy in your presence,
with eternal pleasures at your right hand.

God’s promise to us in Psalm 16 is that God will not abandon us – leave us alone. Verse 11 assures us that in God’s presense is FULLNESS of JOY!

When I feel alone, isolated, or think that I am “the only one who….” I must recognize that God is with me – I am NOT alone.

Our challenge as daughters of our Heavenly Father is to recognize God’s presence even when we don’t feel it. When we open ourselves to sensing that God is with us every moment of every day – that will become our reality.

God has not moved.

He is still on the throne.

He will never leave us all alone.