Tag Archives: Parenting

by

Floating

Approaching Sweden

Approaching Sweden

I have spent the past two weeks floating – figuratively and actually. We were able to fulfill a lifelong dream of mine to visit Sweden, the home of my maternal grandmother. I was floating in a dream come true that ended up exceeding my expectations. We also visited other counties bordering the Baltic Sea which was the actual floating bit, moving from one port to the next.

We had been planning and saving for this trip for a long time. Phil did almost all the work of making reservations, flight plans, and tours of the various cities. The past several years our vacations have included major league baseball games. This year – it was art museums, palaces, and cathedrals. Phil did a great job. Everything went smoothly except that his suitcase didn’t arrive until the 3rd day, which was fine because he doesn’t mind wearing the same shirt over again!

Like planning any big event – a wedding, a family reunion, an anniversary celebration – it takes some hard work and careful planning to carry it off. Even then, the unexpected often happens. That is when it is best to float – just go with the current. We can’t change the unexpected circumstances – but we can choose our response.

There is a good example of this challenge, let’s call it the “floating challenge” in the Bible. In Genesis God tells Noah to build an ark to save himself and his family from the judgement that God was going to shower on mankind. Get it – “shower”?

Back to Genesis, God tells Noah to build an ark and he gives Noah very specific instructions. So, Noah and his sons become the laughing-stock of their community because they dedicate themselves to building a very large boat – on dry land. They ignore the trash talk and stay focused on their goal – building the ark. The rains come and Noah and his family are ready. They had made preparations according to God’s directions and the ark held Noah and his family and lots of animals. (more that just two of some species – see Genesis 7:2)

It rains for 40 days and 40 nights and then….

they float.

They float for about 10 months. You can imagine that it takes quite a while for the water to recede and the ground to dry out enough for all to leave the ark.

Genesis 8:1-8

8 But God remembered Noah and all the wild animals and the livestock that were with him in the ark, and he sent a wind over the earth, and the waters receded. 2 Now the springs of the deep and the floodgates of the heavens had been closed, and the rain had stopped falling from the sky. 3 The water receded steadily from the earth. At the end of the hundred and fifty days the water had gone down, 4 and on the seventeenth day of the seventh month the ark came to rest on the mountains of Ararat. 5 The waters continued to recede until the tenth month, and on the first day of the tenth month the tops of the mountains became visible.

But that is not all – you can read the rest of the waiting period in the verses that follow in Genesis 8.

God gives directions to Noah about building the ark and about gathering his family and the animals. God also gives directions to Noah upon leaving the ark.

But nothing is said about floating. That is the time they had to wait and trust until God showed them what was next. That was the floating challenge.

That is so much like parenting, isn’t it? We plan, prepare, train, teach, feed and cloth our children. We do our best to instill strong moral character and Godly principles in their lives. Yet after all the preparations, the “floating” comes. The time when we must wait and trust God with the outcome.

There doesn’t appear to be any navigational system on the ark. Noah had to believe that it would float where it should. Or more accurately, that where the ark floated was exactly where God wanted it to float. In the end, God had it covered. He is faithful.

That is the faith I need to have in God. Faith that God will use my attempts to follow His plan for parenting. Then in the times of floating, the times when I have no control, God will once again prove Himself faithful.

Some floating may be calm.

Some floating may be on rough seas, even tempests.

Do I believe that God is in control of the floating?

Yes, God is faithful.

by

Because I Said So

Woody Family in 1990

Woody Family in 1990

I will NEVER say that to my children – “Because I said so”.

I remember thinking that after my mother had used that response with me, probably because I kept asking “why?”

I ended up using that phrase many times with my own children, simply because it was the only response that fit the moment. Sometimes explanations simply don’t work. This happens when;

  • the child is too young to understand the reason
  • the child keeps asking “why” even when a reason is given
  • the reason seems unfair to the child
  • there is not time to explain – the obedience must be immediate

“Because I said so” is the time-honored response of parents because we have authority as parents to decide what is best for our child at any given time. This does not mean we should never give a reason for what we ask our child to do. Many times an explanation helps develop positive communication between a parent and a child.

We must remember though, we are the parents and our children will not always understand what we ask them to do. Learning to obey even when we don’t understand is an important life lesson. Our teachers, coaches, employers, and officials will ask us to do things throughout our lives that we neither understand or like. We still need to do them unless it violates God’s will. Life will be so much more pleasant for our children if they learn this sooner than later.

Isn’t it true for us as adults as well? We are willing to follow rules when we know they are for our good – but if we don’t understand, well that is a different story. Yet we often don’t understand what God is allowing to happen in our lives while we are going through it. It is only as we look back that we see His love and grace at work. Sometimes we won’t know God’s purpose until we meet Him face to face.

Jesus had to teach this principle to His disciples. In Luke 5:4-6

4 When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, “Put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch.”

5 Simon answered, “Master, we’ve worked hard all night and haven’t caught anything. But because you say so, I will let down the nets.” (emphasis mine)

6 When they had done so, they caught such a large number of fish that their nets began to break. 7 So they signaled their partners in the other boat to come and help them, and they came and filled both boats so full that they began to sink.

Jesus told Peter to go out and throw his nets into deep water (not the usual place to make a good catch)in the day (after they had fished all night and caught nothing). Peter answers Jesus, “but because you say so”…

Peter, James, and John would never have experienced the blessing of catching all those fish if they had not obeyed Jesus. Will we obey when the Lord tells us to “love our enemies”, “do good to those who spitefully use us”, “forgive as we have been forgiven”?

Are we willing to obey God even when we don’t understand why?

I pray we learn to obey our heavenly Father ” because He said so” and teach that lesson to our children as well.

by

“I’m Thirsty!”

Caleb

The children were all in bed and we had just settled down to play Settlers of Catan, our current favorite board game. There was the “pitter patter” of little feet and a sleepy looking boy came up the stairs and said “I’m thirsty”.

As his mother went into the kitchen to get him a drink, Bad Nana – me, snuck him two spoonfuls of ice cream.

So what if he thinks that if he wakes up at night he will get ice cream?

I won’t be around.

After several dirty looks from my daughter, the little guy went back to bed and I am pleased to say, he stayed until morning. Which, by the way, is 6:00 am.

We all get thirsty and we are quick to satisfy that thirst for ourselves, our children and grandchildren. We are so fortunate to have a ready supply of clean water, not everyone in the world has that blessing. Water is an essential need of our physical bodies as human beings and an important source of continued health.

Our spiritual health depends on our supply of “living water.” If we don’t renew that supply daily we will dry up spiritually with souls like a desert wasteland. Jesus taught on this spiritual thirst.

John 7:37-38 (NIV)

37 On the last and greatest day of the festival, Jesus stood and said in a loud voice,
“Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. 38 Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.”

So, what is this “living water?”

John goes on to tell us in verse 39

39 By this he meant the Spirit, whom those who believed in him were later to receive. Up to that time the Spirit had not been given, since Jesus had not yet been glorified.

The Spirit of God is water to our souls. We need the Holy Spirit to not only quench our thirst, but to “overflow” to those around us.

I start teaching school next week. I am looking forward to meeting new students and seeing my upper level students again. A new school year brings the excitement of the “new”:
* new students
* new co-workers
* new curriculum and the resulting new lessons
* new shoes

As I encounter all the “new” I must remember that the “new” quickly wears off and the result can be the BORING same old – same old – unless I intentionally make the effort to renew.

Our children, our families, our friends, our co-workers, and our students are thirsty.

Our pastor read the above scripture yesterday and challenged us with the need to “spill over to those around us”.

To spill over, I must first be full myself. I become filled spiritually through studying God’s word, prayer, worshipping, and fellowship with other Christians. These spiritual practices fill me with living water. It is amazing how even little bits of time spent “drinking” living water can fill me to overflowing. I need to be intentional about keeping my living water level full.

We live in a dry and thirsty world.

As a young mother, a wife, a co-worker, a grandmother – whatever role or roles I find myself in – I must satisfy my spiritual thirst so that I will overflow with LIVING WATER to those around me.