Category Archives: Parenting

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Unfinished Projects

Projects, some finished, some in process.

Projects, some finished, some in process.

How many unfinished projects do you have stashed away?

I have many. I have my 20 year projects, my 15 year projects, my 10 year projects, and the projects I planned to finish this week…..all 38 of them.

You get the picture. I start something with great excitement and anticipation of its completed glory, only to get bogged down in the pressures and responsibility of everyday life.

Or, things get a bit difficult –  like my points don’t meet at the corners on my log cabin quilt squares. So, I put all the parts of that project in a bag and put it in the closet and wait for a “better time” to work on it.

Meanwhile, I start another project!

Well, I am retired now and I have begun finishing projects! Yes, and to be honest, I really had no idea I had so many projects stashed away.  I am not allowing myself to become overwhelmed – I am chipping away – one by one.

So family – be forewarned – these finished projects are potential Christmas presents!

While working on these projects, it dawned on me that I am an unfinished project. God began His work in my life 57 years ago when I became a Christian and He is still not finished.

  • He has not given up
  • He has not abandoned me for a more “exciting” project
  • He has hung in there even when I have resisted His alterations
  • He has not hidden me away on a shelf, embarrassed by my obvious lack of following His instructions

In Philippians 1:3-6, Paul writes the following to the Christians in Philpi.

3 I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6 being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

I am SO THANKFUL that God is not like I am. He is a loving, kind, and patient Father. He is willing to keep working on me. I love the part of the verse that says – “he who began the good work in you will carry it on to completion”.

What a precious promise! I am an unfinished project…..and God will keep working on me until He is finished.

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Labels

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Few of us want labels to define us, unless of course the label is

  • genius
  • super star
  • prodigy
  • billionaire

Yet, even if we may like being thought of as extraordinary, there are times when it is very difficult to live up to the label. In recent years there have been several comedians who have ended their lives while still successful because the burden of being “funny” all the time. It took its toll.

Labels are often not of our choosing and even though there is an element of truth to the label, it does not reflect the whole picture. Our children or grandchildren may be singled out for testing to determine if they are eligible for certain services. These services are often very helpful and will give these children added support – they also come with a label.

Some parents hesitate to accept the services offered because they do not want a certain label to follow their child throughout their schooling – maybe even following them into adulthood.

My niece is one of those people. As a child Zoe was identified as ADHD – Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. She was never a behavior problem, in fact she was just the opposite, a quiet, kind, thoughtful child. She just had trouble focusing in class.

To her parents credit, they did their homework and found the best course of treatment for their daughter. They also did not leave it all to the medication. They helped Zoe follow through on assigned tasks and helped her develop coping strategies to avoid the common concerns of people with ADHD.

Her parents were her BEST advocates, making sure that she got the services she needed, but not letting ADHD define her or become an excuse for not reaching her full potential.

Zoe could have numerous labels:

  • Bachelor’s and Master’s degrees from DePaul University in Chicago
  • Journalism Major
  • employed as WEB Content administrator at DePaul University
  • beautiful young lady inside and out!
  • courageous person with ADHD

Zoe has not let ADHD define her nor limit her dreams. She recently posted the following on Facebook which took real courage. (click on zoe)

zoe

Zoe is an inspiration to others with ADHD, and also to parents and grandparents of children identified with labels.

When reading Zoe’s essay, I was reminded of these Bible verses that have been such an encouragement to me.

Psalm 139:13-15 (NIV)

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.

No matter what labels may be attached to ourselves, our children, or our grandchildren, God knew us from the beginning and He says we are wonderfully made.

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Testing

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I spoke to the students of Smoky Mountain High School’s chapter of Fellowship of Christian Athletes last Friday. I was so blessed to see these young people and their willingness to get up early and come to school on Friday morning at 7:30 am!

They did not know I was going to talk to them about testing.

“How many of you have a test today?” I started by asking.

I went on to share the following message because I know God is dealing with me about this issue and I know some of you are facing life challenges as well.

Ok, to be honest, if we are alive, we are facing challenges, some good, some not so good, and some outright devastating.

What is the purpose of a test?

Good tests have a very important purpose – that is to show you as a student what you have learned – what you know – and what you still need to study or work on.

Tests are not effective when used as a “gotcha” strategy, to catch the students who did not read the assigned passage, or when used as a punishment. They are not effective when they are too easy and everyone gets an “A”, or when they are too hard and no one passes.

A test that covers what a class has recently learned gives both the students AND the teacher a good picture of what has already been learned and what still needs more instruction or practice.

I am participating in the Community Woman’s Bible study and we are studying I and II Thessalonians. When the following verses came up, I began thinking about testing from a teachers point of view, like I just mentioned.

1 Thessalonians 2:1-4 (NIV)

2 You know, brothers and sisters that our visit to you was not without results. 2 We had previously suffered and been treated outrageously in Philippi, as you know, but with the help of our God we dared to tell you his gospel in the face of strong opposition. 3 For the appeal we make does not spring from error or impure motives, nor are we trying to trick you. 4 On the contrary, we speak as those approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel. We are not trying to please people but God, who tests our hearts.

I asked myself – why does God test us? If He knows everything like the Bible says He does – He knows our very thoughts and the intents of our hearts –

He already knows what I know. God does not need to test me to see how I will do. I believe God tests us so that WE realize where we are in our journey with Him.

If we go through a hard time – do we whine and fuss and think God has turned His back on us? Do we give in to fear?

When we do, we fail the test. The failure shows us what we need to work on.

So do we give up when we fail a test?

NO!

We need to ask forgiveness and examine ourselves. I need to read God’s Word and see what He has to say about what I am facing. I need to get with my friends who are Christians and we need to pray for each other in this area.

James 1:2-4

2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

The test for me right now is trusting God to show me what He wants me to do with my time. I’ve retired from teaching – but there is no retirement from being a Christian. All of us have a purpose to fulfill in the Body of Christ.

So – we need to thank God for each test,  and just as James says, allow each trial to finish its work.