Category Archives: Being a Wife

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Driving me CRAZY!!

Never this sweet girl!

Never this sweet girl!

There are certain looks, or tones of voice, certain words or phrases that can drive us crazy. (whatever!)

I remember thinking if one more child walks in the door and the FIRST thing they say is “What’s for supper?” that I just might roast that child!!!

It’s those little irritants that can make a day so trying. Here are a few that come quickly to mind:

  •  I have just mopped the kitchen floor and they come in from soccer practice in their cleats.
  •  I have just finished getting everyone dressed, ready to go out the door and a HUGE stinky diaper is detected
  •  I have all the kids in their car seats and one has to go to the bathroom – RIGHT NOW
  •  We sorted the toys while the youngest is taking a nap. After that child wakes up – she dumps all the toys out.
  •  We are all dressed up for a family picture and the baby spits up on the ONLY blouse I can button right now.
  •  I have 4 suckers of different colors and they ALL want the green one.

You get the picture – these are all little things – but they can be so irritating.

I read recently about the process that a clam goes through in making a pearl.  A grain of sand  – or other irritant – gets in the shell. The clam forms a coating, layer after layer of smooth surface to cover that irritant. That becomes the pearl! It no longer irritates because it is smooth and round.

What a lovely picture.

Those very things our children do that drive us crazy can become the substance of something very beautiful. It is not the behavior that becomes beautiful, but my response to it. If I can be patient, loving, and full of grace in those trying situations – something of beauty is formed.

Jesus is teaching about the Kingdom Of Heaven in Matthew 13. He wants his disciples, and us, to understand that the Kingdom of Heaven is of great value because it is where the King – God – rules or has authority. Jesus says –

Matthew 13:45-46   AMP

45 Again the kingdom of heaven is like a man who is a dealer in search of fine and precious pearls,

46 Who, on finding a single pearl of great price, went and sold all he had and bought it.

Jesus wants us to value God’s authority in our lives more than anything else. He wants us to value His rule as we would a very expensive pearl. The Lord desires to use those things in our lives that we see as irritants to “polish” off our rough edges and make us “shiny” enough to reflect His glory.

I pray that we can see the things that rub us the wrong way as people or circumstances that God is using in our lives.

It’s ok to recognize that certain behaviors are driving us crazy – but let’s allow God to use those very things to make us more like Jesus.

 

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“I’m Thirsty!”

Caleb

The children were all in bed and we had just settled down to play Settlers of Catan, our current favorite board game. There was the “pitter patter” of little feet and a sleepy looking boy came up the stairs and said “I’m thirsty”.

As his mother went into the kitchen to get him a drink, Bad Nana – me, snuck him two spoonfuls of ice cream.

So what if he thinks that if he wakes up at night he will get ice cream?

I won’t be around.

After several dirty looks from my daughter, the little guy went back to bed and I am pleased to say, he stayed until morning. Which, by the way, is 6:00 am.

We all get thirsty and we are quick to satisfy that thirst for ourselves, our children and grandchildren. We are so fortunate to have a ready supply of clean water, not everyone in the world has that blessing. Water is an essential need of our physical bodies as human beings and an important source of continued health.

Our spiritual health depends on our supply of “living water.” If we don’t renew that supply daily we will dry up spiritually with souls like a desert wasteland. Jesus taught on this spiritual thirst.

John 7:37-38 (NIV)

37 On the last and greatest day of the festival, Jesus stood and said in a loud voice,
“Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. 38 Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.”

So, what is this “living water?”

John goes on to tell us in verse 39

39 By this he meant the Spirit, whom those who believed in him were later to receive. Up to that time the Spirit had not been given, since Jesus had not yet been glorified.

The Spirit of God is water to our souls. We need the Holy Spirit to not only quench our thirst, but to “overflow” to those around us.

I start teaching school next week. I am looking forward to meeting new students and seeing my upper level students again. A new school year brings the excitement of the “new”:
* new students
* new co-workers
* new curriculum and the resulting new lessons
* new shoes

As I encounter all the “new” I must remember that the “new” quickly wears off and the result can be the BORING same old – same old – unless I intentionally make the effort to renew.

Our children, our families, our friends, our co-workers, and our students are thirsty.

Our pastor read the above scripture yesterday and challenged us with the need to “spill over to those around us”.

To spill over, I must first be full myself. I become filled spiritually through studying God’s word, prayer, worshipping, and fellowship with other Christians. These spiritual practices fill me with living water. It is amazing how even little bits of time spent “drinking” living water can fill me to overflowing. I need to be intentional about keeping my living water level full.

We live in a dry and thirsty world.

As a young mother, a wife, a co-worker, a grandmother – whatever role or roles I find myself in – I must satisfy my spiritual thirst so that I will overflow with LIVING WATER to those around me.

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My Failure or I’m a BIG Hypocrite

IMG_5679

“So, what did you think about that?”

I listened for a moment, and then proceeded to criticize my husband’s response.

Busted!

I proceeded to explain to him that he was being CRITICAL.

REALLY?

I also went further (inserting both feet in my mouth) to tell him that his response was HYPOCRITICAL.

Everything I accused him of I was doing myself.

Shame washed over me – but the damage was done.

I couldn’t take back my words or the feelings they invoked. The thought went through my mind that I have been on my journey as a Christian for over 50 years, yet I am still failing to love the person who means the most to me, my husband.

I can blog all day about respectful relationships with my children and grandchildren – yet it is all meaningless if I don’t live it out myself in my primary relationship – with my husband.

The mission statement of this blog is “Reflecting the Image of God in Our Relationships”.

That means ALL relationships. Not just the ones I blog about, or the ones other people see.

Yet that is the beauty of our journey as Christians. God is taking us from wherever we are to the destination of being conformed to the likeness of His son, Jesus. As a journey, there are wrong turns, detours, even wrecks. We still press on. Paul says in Philippians 3:12-14 (NIV)

12 Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

We will receive that prize if we stay on the journey.

So – I ask forgiveness, get off the path of criticism and judgment, and press on – “straining toward what is ahead.”

My friend Alice Marie and I were talking about the pictures we post on Facebook. She mentioned that they give a snapshot – but an incomplete view of our lives. We post the “events” – the parties, get togethers, the cute poses – and these are so much fun to see. They are certainly true – but not the whole story. We should celebrate and share the special times – always remembering that they are just part of the picture.

We don’t post the fights, crying fits, or major messes of our lives. Nor should we. These would often be disrespectful of those involved.

Alice Marie made me think about the photos I post and the things I write about.

I want to tell the truth, give the complete picture and at the same time, celebrate the beauty and wonder of our journey as Christians. God loves us so much that He shows us our failures and gives us the grace to admit them, ask forgiveness, and get back on the right path.

So, I will PRESS ON, thankful that Phil walks in forgiveness with me.

I sure need it.

REALLY!